Dear Answer Angel Ellen: Can you referee a dispute I’m having with my partner? He says men in what he calls “jaunty” hats look fashionable, noteworthy, interesting and well-dressed. I think that, depending on the hat, they look silly, self-important, foolish, outlandish, embarrassing or just plain dumb.
What is your opinion?
–Jen J.
Dear Jen: The number of men’s hat styles is mind-blowing: fedora, newsboy, beret, porkpie, cowboy, Aussie/Outback, top hat, boater, homburg, Panama, pith helmet, stocking cap, bowler/derby, beanie, elf, Santa and, of course, baseball.
I’m not sure which among these fall into your partner’s “jaunty” category. On the right person and the right occasion, some of these look good, or at least, interesting.
You asked my opinion and I agree with you that, while many of these styles are attention-getting, many are problematic. Clearly, you’ve let your partner know what you think. He disagrees. In any marriage or partnership there are differing opinions.
In the grand universe of things to argue about, this is small, but still (to you) very irritating. The issue cries out for compromise. Maybe you suggest he wear his choice of headwear when he is not with you? Or on Tuesdays only?
Strike a bargain and move on to larger issues. I know that is easier said than done but try it. Thanks for asking.
Dear Answer Angel Ellen: In a recent column you addressed the reliability of “best-of” beauty products in magazines and online. Are these lists actually just advertising plugs with no credible (much less scientific) testing?
I recently read an article claiming the top beauty products. I can’t help but wonder if they are only looking at products that have been sent to them by manufacturers looking for placement. How do we know what their selection process is? Do they really review every lip gloss or mascara in the market? They reference staffers’ opinions, but what is their process for ranking the items they do review, assuming they even review multiple products?
Decades ago I worked for a national store catalog and we sent unsolicited items out to various media for placement in their magazines — just looking for free advertising.
–Mary K.
Dear Mary: Thank you for your well-placed skepticism. If the source of the “best” lists doesn’t offer an explanation of how they research the products, their process is less than scientific and they might do this:
*Give significant weight to products that supply free samples to the publication, blogger or website
*Give advertisers special consideration
*Take a poll of their staff’s favorites
*Make sure to mix in lower-priced products so they give options for those who won’t pay $85 for a Hermes lipstick or $1,000+ for a pair of The Row sandals
Dear Answer Angel Ellen: What is the right length now for men and women’s pants.
–Lilly D.
Dear Mary Kay: It is more confusing than ever. I’ve seen “well-dressed” women in white pants that are literally dragging on the ground. Who are these people? Do they own a dry-cleaning service? In any case, I think this drag-on-the floor women’s fashion is growing in popularity but always ridiculous.
Designer Tom Ford designs men’s suits with pants so short — above the ankle — that they have a Pee-wee Herman vibe.
For ordinary men: A slight crease or “break” at the very top of the shoe is traditional for classic trousers. It’s slightly shorter for jeans and casual pants: at the anklebone but not bunching at the ankle. For women, there is more variety: touching the top of or covering the anklebone, or a slight crease at the shoe (the men’s classic) or areas between the two.
Bottom line: Not touching the ground. This is particularly tough for women who wear various heel heights.
Angelic Readers
Some money-saving advice from frugal readers…
Lucy T. writes: “I just read your response to BethAnn who was asking about reputable sources for information about products. You recommended checking Consumer Reports and said it requires a subscription in most cases. Before subscribing to Consumer Reports or New York Times (to read its wirecutter.com product reviews) she should check her local library’s online resources. Many libraries have subscriptions to Consumer Reports, which are then available free if you have a library card. Some have New York Times subscriptions with access to wirecutter.com as well. Libraries are awesome!” Liz P. had the same excellent recommendation.
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